The closest I could get... |
I'm dog-sitting, and decided Jackson could do with an abbreviated walk this morning, thank you rain. So instead of turning out onto the main road, we turned back down our street toward the dead end.
Little did I know.
It's Batman.
Well, that's a bonus of dog-sitting, I guess.
I'm not really a dog person. I do well with Magnum, my dad's mature (as in, 12 years old) Malamute/Shepherd mix. But these friends of my parents have been wanting to make a road-trip out to Montana and didn't want to leave their new-ish rescue dog alone or in a kennel.
Very cute. With sharp claws. |
Enter Red.
Living with parents.
Still jobless.
Hey, it's easy money, I figured.
I should have asked for more. Jackson is a high-maintenance two-year-old Rottweiler/German Shepherd mix. That's right. Two. As in, puppy. As in, "play with me now!" I'm not really a "playful" person in the way he needs, but I'm learning. Mostly I'm learning that tug-of-war is a better option than him trying to climb onto my lap for attention and scratching me with his wolf-like claws. He doesn't know his own strength, and it is up to me to teach him not to jump on me.
I thought we were getting somewhere, but then yesterday I saw an awful lot of bared teeth. Even after I put him out on his runner to use up some energy, he was fired up. I think he got into some kind of bad weed. Or something. Cocaine. I don't know.
Oh. And there's a cat. My new nemesis. Spice is clearly allied with the Dark Side. I had forgotten they even have a cat until my hostess was running me through my duties. The cat's hardly ever around, so I don't think I'd even met her before.
She's quiet.
Unobtrusive.
I could go all day and not see her.
She's a luxuriously soft long-hair cat.
Spice. Isn't she purr-ty?...with Darth Maul eyes. |
What's wrong with that?
When I agreed to house-sit and had been freely told "Feel free to bring friends over," I began talking with Brett about possible times he could visit. It would be great. A whole house with no parents (mine) or kids (his) around.
Nice.
Especially because lately, due to (in chronological order) his finances, my finances, my car and his job, we've not seen each other in three weeks. THREE WEEKS! And on that visit I was accompanied by Aphrodite, so again, no alone time.
Dog-sitting was like a golden opportunity. Was. Enter the Dark Side.
Brett is hugely allergic to cats.
BRETT IS HUGELY ALLERGIC TO CATS!
Yeah. That's how it feels. |
Stupid "Spice".
Stupid, sweet, fluffy, unobtrusive "Spice".
Emperor Palpatine, more like. Never seen, but controlling what happens, and all for evil.
I hate that cat.
ReplyDeleteThose of us trying to bring peace to the galaxy ALL hate Emperor Palpatine.
DeleteBenadryl?
ReplyDeleteHis allergic reaction is pretty strong, apparently. I'm not sure if regular Benadryl would help. And I don't want him to have to spend money on expensive drugs because of me!
DeleteLock the cat in the closet, vacuum, open all the windows, and pump him full of OTC allergy meds. Oh, and booze.
ReplyDeleteUnless, of course, he's one of those people who swells up and dies when one cat hair touches them. In which case, that sucks...!!! :(
*pump BRETT full of allergy meds* Not the cat.
DeleteJust because, well, you know it doesn't work the other way around...
But you could probably give the cat booze too.
I like that: liquor up the cat so that he sleeps through a visit. Although ...well I guess I could shut her in the room with the cat-box.
DeleteYeah, he just needs to get all med'd up before he comes to see you. And maybe keep the cat in a closet. And vacuum. So . . . pretty much what the above commenter said.
ReplyDeleteThis just reaffirms my opinion that cats are evil.
I've never really disliked cats, just never had a desire to have fur-bearing animals in my house. And I'd actually prefer cats to dogs because they're not the attention-whores and don't require walks. But I'm quickly becoming anti-cat.
DeleteThat darn cat! Such a cliche, I know! Because you know, there is a movie...and it's titled "That Darn Cat!"
ReplyDeleteNot even a slow clap? No?
*Lowers head and trudges back home in shame*
I'll give you the slow clap! I'll even throw in a single chuckle, too.
DeleteI've been humming Sheldon's "soft kitty" song since I got here. Oh, the irony. "little ball of fur" indeed.
A slow clap aaand a single chuckle? Just made my day!
DeleteNow you've gone and me think about our cat, Motley; he has been missing for about two months now, probably a victim of the local coyotes. I should probably write a post about it.
ReplyDeleteHe probably joined the dark side. They don't have cookies, they have kitty-treats.
DeleteMy daughter's cat, Boo, might just be the Sith Lord. She threw me down the steps the other day. Or... did that stupid cat thing when they twist around your ankles. But I know what she was up to, MAN!! Then BOOM, I go down (with the bowl of cereal). Next thing you know she's eating my breakfast... Jerk.
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain.
Hugs!
Valerie
Wow. Personal destruction for the sake of your tasty beakfast? Sith Lord alright.
DeleteRebel! Rebel! ...oh, and brush up on your light saber technique.
I have found all the cats I've known too aloof. I love a little, energetic, and loving dog. My family dog is just the sweetest thing, and I'm looking into getting one of my own now as well!
ReplyDeleteI do well with mature dogs that aren't always begging for attention. My dad's dog appreciate the lovin', but only seeks it when there's a thunderstorm. 'Cause he's tough like that.
DeleteThis is why I am a big fan of adopting adult dogs. That are already house trained and that way I also know how big they are so I can keep to medium sized dogs. Plus so many adults need homes and everybody wants puppies so I get to feel like some sort of dog adopting superhero.
ReplyDelete...and adults are less hyper. If I get infected because this dog keeps jumping up and scratching me, my hosts are paying any medical bills because I don't have insurance yet.
Delete(He's really acting up today.)
RED:
ReplyDeleteYour overconfidence and balls of strings are your weakness
THE EMPEROR CAT:
Your faith in your friend's allergies is yours
RED:
Damn-it
That's it. Exactly.
DeleteI am so sorry to hear the two of you haven't seen each other in three weeks. That's not good. At this rate, I'll never be a bridesmaid...I mean, let the bloggers donate money to your love cause. I have a dollar to contribute!
ReplyDeleteWe're keeping the love alive via texts and nightly phone calls. Doggone I miss him!
Delete