Wednesday Hodgepodge

I've seen this link-up on a few blogs, so this week I decided to take the plunge. It's still Wednesday in the US, so I figure I'm okay. It comes from From This Side of the Pond.

I can't make the button link, so here's the link.

So, here goes. My answers to the six questions of the week.

1. What happens to the mail at your house? 
We just moved to Vietnam, so I have no idea. Since we live in a small apartment owned by the guy who owns the coffee shop on the first floor, I would imagine that any mail would come to him and he will give it to us when he sees us. Or bring it up to our door. We shall see!

2. Something you always splurge on? Any guilt associated with the splurge? 
The first thing that comes to mind is wine, but I don't really splurge. I'm happy with the cheap stuff. Probably croissants. I have found that a proper croissant is a delicious breakfast, but they are hard to find here. Guilt came when we lived in Beijing and I had croissants delivered regularly. Guilt from calories and from the expense. Not here though. I can't get them as often.


3. There are many, but what are two important questions you think every bride and groom should ask/answer before they plan their walk down the aisle?

*blows on fingernails* 
NUMBER ONE! Discuss having children. This is not just a question, but a heart-to-heart, and BELIEVE your S.O. whatever he or she says. If you are not on the same page about having children or not, DON'T DO IT! How many stupid people have I seen get married thinking the other person would change their mind or get on board with the idea, then crash and burn. And I'm not going to soften that word "stupid". To not adequately address this subject before marriage is the definition of stupid. Just don't.

TWO is somewhat related, but broader: What habits does your S.O. have that raise red flags? Ask yourself if you can live with that for the rest of your life. Chewing with their mouth open? Sounds petty but if it will grate on your nerves every day, forever, it's not worth the commitment. Do not expect or hope they will change in conjunction with your wishes. People may change, but you cannot force it.  


4. What's the best advice your father ever gave you?
One time I was planning something and debating whether to tell the other person about it because I wasn't sure it would happen - an outing or party, or something - and my Dad said not to "deprive them of the joy of anticipation." He was very animated about it. Especially since I wasn't sure I could pull it off, at least letting the other person know I was thinking of doing something special would make them smile. I love that. 


5. Your favorite movie where a father features heavily in the storyline?
There are two that came quickly to mind:
Dead Poet's Society (Remember Kurtwood Smith's character?) He's a minor character, but pivotal.
Field of Dreams - I'm not actually sure about the "father" part, but wasn't the whole point his connection with his dad?


6. Insert your own random thought here.
I'm seeing a lot out there this week about failure, or feeling like a failure, or quitting (my own post). I think failure has become a dirty word, but we need to flip the script. Last night I was overcharged for some food from a food cart, and I felt terrible later ... like I had personally failed because I didn't bargain them down. 

Flip the script.
It's not failure on my part or a con on their part. I simply paid extra for a late night purchase when they were closing.
Or, I paid extra because I can. 
I am doing my part to improve their services.

How will you flip the negative script that runs in your head when something bad happens?