16 April, 2012

The Movie Whore and "Elizabeth"

Boy was the Movie Whore confused! …but you’ll have to wait to read why. (…and sorry about the pronouns here. They are inconsistent and I know it. I think I’m becoming schizophrenic.)

Our friend Bozo posted in a recent blog post some movies for the Movie Whore to review that Bozo knows about. Where Bozo lives, she doesn’t have a lot of opportunity to see movies right away, so Bozo often doesn’t have much to relate to when the Movie Whore talks about the latest new release.

So the Movie Whore decided that Elizabeth sounded like a good place to start, of the movies listed that we don’t know. We went to the library and checked out the “Elizabeth” movie starring Cate Blanchett and took it home to watch.

First of all, what a fascinating beginning! It reminded me of The Godfather! – all that plotting in another language, and using the church as a cover for their crimes! (Don’t jump ahead, if you know where this post is going. The Movie Whore will get there.) Wow, pretty exciting and very modern, even though, you know, it isn’t modern at all!

This movie makes the Movie Whore very curious about the genuine history of Elizabeth. When I was in Jr. High, my best friend was English and as a project for History class, she wrote “A Shorter History of England”, which was 100 pages or so including all her pictures. We were all annoyed that she so exceeded the bounds of the assignment, but she insisted that it was shorter than the whole thing. I believe her.

Somehow, with all my personal knowledge of England’s history via a young friend, and even having visited England a couple times, and toured the Tower of London, I still seem not to have paid enough attention for the Movie Whore to know the difference between what in this movie is based on fact and what has been assumed about the queen. The Movie Whore is very mean, and is now chastising me about reading so much fiction when I could have been reading things that would help her out here!

Random thoughts about "Elizabeth":
The Movie Whore thought there was too much emphasis on the romance between Raleigh and Bess. (…wait for it…) But then, we’re not romantic. We like our history without fluff.

Geoffrey Rush. Yeah. Wasn’t he the King’s tutor in The King’s Speech? He seems to be destined for roles in support of the royalty!

The Catholics kept referring to the Virgin Queen as a whore, and the Movie Whore is very curious as to whether they use that word the way she does - non-literally, or if there is any knowledge that Elizabeth had a history of sexual promiscuity! (…wait for it…)

She is also curious as to whether there is documentation of Elizabeth’s anxiety about the execution of Mary. (I hope that wasn’t a spoiler. Since it’s an historic event, I don’t think it can be.)

Being a big Monty Python fan, the Movie Whore might have shouted “NO-O one expects the Spanish Inquisition!” in a snarky English accent at the TV. She might have done this more than once. (and maybe listed their chief weapons…)

The Movie Whore congratulated my inner bibliophile for having read a historical-fiction novel a while back that gave us background knowledge about the fire stations on the coast that were used to relay the news of the attack. (...wait...)

One question came to mind when I saw the tagline at the end about the “Loss of the Armada was the greatest defeat in Spain’s history”. Why was there no more focus on this attack? They spent so much film on a romance that was really kind of a side-bar, and barely any on this amazing historical defeat! (…wait for it…) 

AND(NOW!)
Because the Movie Whore is even worse as a DVD Whore, and must watch all the extras, we watched the extras and the interviews, and it was then that I realized…

I WATCHED THE WRONG MOVIE!

DOH!

Who knew there were two!?

I had in Elizabeth: The Golden Age, which apparently is the sequel to the one Bozo listed!
…which explained why I never noticed the scene Bozo referred to!

Fortunately the Movie Whore didn’t get upset, because she was laughing her evil laugh too loudly to be angry.

...Laughing at me.

For being a goober.

Which I am.

Well, Bozo? You’re getting a two-fer. Because obviously my next step was to go check out the first one. The Movie Whore will be back shortly with that review.

18 comments:

  1. I get all my knowledge of British history from Monty Python and Black Adder.

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    1. (when I see "i knew it" in all caps like that, I instantly think of that scene in Ferris Bueller's Day Off when Jeannie comes home and finds out he's scamming everyone and she screams "I KNEW IT!" and storms out.)

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    2. But then Ferris still got away with it and even got the girl in the end.

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    3. Bozo, you nut. I saw your comment in my email, and thought you were smirking about my picking the wrong movie! Then I come over here and see the *location* of your smirk.
      ...oh, yeah! That!

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    4. Lol, ok, NOW I can go to bed!

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  2. I also love Brett, for bringing up Blackadder. Every single person I talk to about that show looks at me like I'm crazy. They've never heard of it, ugh.

    Also, when I hear Spanish Inquisition, I think about Mel Brooks. History of the World Part I, anybody?

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    1. I haven't watched enough Black Adder, just a little to get a taste, but I am fully steeped in Monty Python, and so few people I know outside of the theatre get it! (I have the killer-bunny stapler on my desk at work, and one lady thinks it's "cute".)

      And I remember seeing trailers for History of the World but my parents wouldn't let us see it. There was that scene mocking Moses coming down with the 10 Commandments... which, if Mel Brooks, who is Jewish, can make fun of a primary Jewish leader, why should my Lutheran parents get their knickers in a twist? Just sayin'.

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    2. I guess that is one of the benefits to living in Australia, we get all of British comedy.

      Black Books is up there. Oh, and Mighty Boosch, the original IT Crowd, Father Ted, the original Shameless, The Q Series, Don't Forget The Buzzcocks (if you like music). The list just goes on

      I preferred the later Mel Brooks stuff (blazing Saddles and the like)

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    3. When I had cable, I was addicted to BBCAmerica. Their versions of shows that have been Americanized are usually better. There are good American shows, too, but you can't Americanize something based on British humor.

      Blazing Saddles and Young Frankenstein are two of my "put them in as background" staple DVDs. Spaceballs too.

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  3. Yay! Monty Python reference! I hardly ever watch movies so most likely I would have got the wrong one too. Or given up halfway through and played on the internet.

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    1. Hey, I got the one with the right actress! It was an interesting movie, with all the intrigue.

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  4. The first Elizabeth was a great movie, the second not so much. Not even Cate Blanchett could save it.

    I agree about the overemphasis on the romance aspect. Too much chick flick, not enough awesome battle scenes!

    So your friend turned in a 100 page paper in junior high? Wow, I didn't have to do anything like that until college. Is she a rocket scientist or something now?

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    1. Well, she majored at Cambridge in theology and English, I think. She's now living in New Zealand, but doesn't talk much about work on her FB. Isn't that sad that without FB I don't know what's happening?

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  5. I didn't even know there was a sequel to warn you about! I think the first one has the romance going on too... so that part might be too much for your liking - and, in fact, quite a few sex scenes I think.

    but that one scene as the Virgin Queen... ahhh... I just love it!

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    1. I've seen it by now, just haven't put any thoughts into words. They were both beautiful movies, that's for sure!

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I enjoy a good debate. Feel free to shake things up. Tell me I'm wrong. Ask me why I have such a weird opinion. ...or, just laugh and tell how this relates to you and your life.