(Should "mojo" be hyphenated? I could look that up, but I won't. I don't have enough mojo to tackle that kind of task.)
My mojo is gone. It's been fading and I've been fighting it, but today it's gone.
Inertia is strong in me. It set in last week, when we were dealing with 100° temps and tropical humidity. What can one do? Run errands first thing then lie - reading, talking, scrolling on the phone, napping - in the still cool bedroom until mid-afternoon when it's only in the upper 90s.
That heat-induced inertia seems to have lingered. Today is perfect. The breeze changed direction, the sky is overcast, and temps are mid-90s. (I guess. 34
°C and I don't have energy to convert or look up the conversion.) I should be active.
After about two hours of lying on the bed, playing and scrolling on my phone, I have finally forced myself to sit at the computer and write something. Not because I have something to say, but because I have to "do something".
I'm still not motivated.
Still have a fog in my brain.
Almost pre-depression fog. Maybe I'm actually fighting off depression and being vertical for an hour is a high achievement. Yay me!
So if you are still here reading my rambling to the end, thanks for being my sounding board. Any recommendations? What have you done to fight off summertime inertia?
Why is the inertia a bad thing?
ReplyDeleteSchool ended for me last week, and the last couple days I've felt rather useless. And I keep asking myself why. I have absolutely no reason to need to do anything. I can take a few days to just be.
So, why? It's hot. That's a good reason to rest. Sometimes your body asks for rest so it can deal with any lingering issues that might become illness. And unless there's some pressing reason why something needs to get done, take the time and just be. There'll be time later to do something when you're ready to.
You and my husband are in cahoots, aren't you? That's the same thing he says.
DeleteIt's my upbringing, I guess? Not that I was pushed into anything, but somehow the concept of constant productivity seeped into my subconscious.
You're right. And yesterday I realized that the exhaustion may stem from stress about things happening in this country right now. It's viable and valuable, and if I need to rest, I need to rest!
Perhaps if two people are saying the same thing independently, it's valid? I know what you mean about constant productivity. I'm feeling that myself right now, even though I have the space to take some time for myself. I suppose that's the lesson of the moment. Enjoy the time where nothing needs to happen.
DeleteIt's definitely valid. My subconscious still kicks me around, though. I really need to fix that.
DeleteI feel like I haven't had mojo for the last few years. However, I feel no guilt about it.
ReplyDeleteI'm getting better.
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