It was hot and sunny today, and the pack was heavy.
Fortunately the air was growing cooler the higher they climbed, but Hunter was still sweating from exertion. Up ahead, Levi had stopped by a tree while the rest of the group hiked past. As Hunter, bringing up the rear, drew level with him, he asked, "Want me to carry the pack for a bit, Dad?"
Hunter smiled and hefted the pack higher on his shoulders. "No thanks. This is for your Uncle Cameron and me to carry."
"Okay." Levi, tall and lanky at 18, hung back to walk alongside his dad for a while.
"I'm glad you wanted to come with us, son."
"Well, we've hiked Mt. Hood before, and with Grandpa, too. Tom and Cal might not remember... were they even with us that trip?" He referred to his two younger brothers who were back home with their mother.
"Hmm... I don't think so. Wasn't that your first overnight trek?"
"Yeah! That's right!"
Soon, at a clearing up ahead, the group stopped for a lunch break. Everyone was sitting around digging into their backpacks. Cameron came over to Hunter, holding out a sandwich. "I'll trade packs after lunch."
"Sounds good." The heavy pack landed with a THUNK and Hunter accepted the sandwich, leaning side to side and stretching his shoulders. The twins sat together, looking around at the group. Cousin Sue was there with her fiance; Cameron's neighbors had joined them; and the owner of Expedition Outfitters down in the valley had insisted on coming along.
He came over to join them. "Hey guys, you doing okay? Need a protein bar?"
"Not for me, thanks, Stu."
Stu sat on a log near them. "Your dad was one of my best customers. Hiking, kayaking, camping, fishing. Glad you guys are keeping the tradition alive."
"Once it's in your blood..."
"Ain't it the truth?"
Their cousin rose to speak. "Excuse me, everyone!" She was holding a plastic clam shell case from a grocery bakery. "Today is a very important day. Happy birthday, Hunter and Cameron! We're so happy to share this event with you." Cheers of "Happy birthday!" were followed by the traditional song, and Sue opened the clam shell container to share around cupcakes with everyone.
After lunch, the group continued their ascent, with Cameron taking the heavy pack and Hunter taking the one with standard supplies. Near the top of Mt. Hood, they stopped. Cameron lowered the heavy pack and he and Hunter opened it, taking out a heavy urn.
"This was our dad's favorite hike," Hunter began.
Cameron added, "Every year, at least once, we came up here together."
"On our birthday, if weather and health permitted."
Everyone in the group shared memories of the deceased father, grandfather, business patron, and neighbor. Then, after a moment of silence, the twin brothers opened the urn and shook their father's ashes into the wind.
Every Friday, a new flash fiction story, inspired by reader comments. Feel free to leave a prompt for future use in the comments below.I'm almost out of prompts. I hope you liked that story, based on the prompt "a birthday for twins" given during the A to Z Challenge by Liz A. (of Laws of Gravity) on my "V" post (here).
If you choose to join in for Fiction Fridays, post a link to your story below in the comments. Next week's prompt is: "hazy". If you join me next week, be sure to come back and share a link to your story!
Just a short Five-Minute Friday post.
On these posts, I follow the one-word prompt from Five Minute Friday.
If
you want to join, click that link. (It's a new link, if you've tried before.) Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post there.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.) It's pretty cool, when I remember to do it. A great community feeling.
This week's one-word is "Worth".
Timer starting...
I have recently been sent into reflection questioning my own worth. I saw a friend harming herself and abandoning her goals - I'd watched for a while, actually, and never spoke up because I know there are bigger issues at play. After months - over a year - I finally, last week, reminded her of her original goal, which seems to have been abandoned.
Perhaps - no, clearly - I chose the wrong words. My intention was pure. I have been part of supposed "accountability" groups which quickly turn into "pat everyone on the back for being lesser than they could be" groups instead of "encourage everyone to step up toward their goals" groups. Drives me crazy and I leave the group. I seek accountability!
We have been friends for decades, so I knew she'd take my nudge in the correct spirit.
Wrong.
She said I was being superior, and assumed judgment.
She has no idea that I am a fragile human under my outward appearance of strength. I've been in tears for two days. What is the point of my life if not to encourage others? How can I bring value to anyone's life if all I ever do is say "you are great"?
I know a handful of people who will faithfully argue that I - my own deeply flawed self - have worth. But right now, I doubt it with every fiber of my being.
Stop.
Just a short Five-Minute Friday post.
On these posts, I follow the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
This week's one-word is "Truth".
Timer starting...
My best friend is a real stickler for the truth. She will cut you out of her life if she catches you in a lie... maybe a bit of an exaggeration, but she won't trust you again. That lie will kick you in the shins for the rest of your relationship. I've seen it happen.
My husband is a great story-teller. He prefers to tell it the way it is funniest. He's popular on social media, and makes friends easily. When it counts, face to face, he's honest. He just has a fuzzy idea on the value of truth. It took me a while to get completely comfortable with that.
Which is best? Personally, I can't lie. Is that why I'm not nearly as popular as my husband on social media, and I struggle to make friends? I don't think so.
Truth is, I've gotten better at appreciating the moment for the moment. I'm trying to learn to accept things that happen and let go of the things that I only wished to happen. My will cannot change what is.
It might change the way I remember something happening, but the truth is, in fact, the truth. The truth is not what I over-analyze it to be even!
What is, is. I pray that it is right.
Stop timer.
Just a short Five-Minute Friday post.
On these posts, I follow the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(I'm getting better at revisiting them, too.)
This week's one-word is "Friend". To be honest, this time I didn't read the whole post at Heading Home before writing. I know what I want to say about "friend"!
Timer starting...
So often we differentiate our friends from "facebook friends", am I right? I have a new friend since moving to China, who recently opened a facebook account. (Please note, facebook is, technically, blocked in China, but most foreigners know how to get around the block to keep in touch back home.)
This friend is a Chinese national, and since we started having adventures together, I've often wished I could tag him on facebook, to share with my friends back home the fun we have! But until recently, I couldn't.
Could I still share the fun with friends back home? Of course. Could I share pictures? Naturally. And I did. We have a mutual foreign friend who apparently shared my posts with him, because one time when he saw me, he thanked me for naming him "friend". I think it was about a mention I made on facebook.
So now, I can tag him, and he can see instantly what my thoughts were about something we did together, and he can leave his comments, too. It is a new dimension to our friendship, and one I enjoy.
I have also found that some people who I knew in real-life, I came to know better by becoming facebook friends. In some cases, this is a good thing, in some cases, not. How much is too much to share?
I believe some lines are best left blurry, but when you find a kindred spirit, you cherish them.
Stop timer.
Just a short Five-Minute Friday post.
On these posts, I follow the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(I'm getting better at revisiting them, too.)
This week's one-word is "Weak".
Timer starting...
My first instinct when I saw this word was my ankle. I don't know what I did - it's not exactly sprained, but... well, that's not really what this "weak" is about, is it?
I have always been a "Strong woman". The opposite of weak. So what can I write?
I have a weakness for good food, and when I pass by a bakery, my willpower is weak. I don't think that's really it either.
When am I weak? What makes me weak?
Lately, every time things go wrong I'm ready to bail. The job situation since our move has been fraught with troubles and disappointments. Just recently, when they started pressing me for my documents to finalize my visa and contract, I balked. I don't love doing what I would be doing with their contract. I have worked with them because I didn't know about other options. Now that I have other options, I don't want this first option anymore. I want to leave that situation. I feel weak and powerless.
I feel like it makes me weak.
Actually, today, I found the strength to call my contact person and explain my hesitation, and guess what? It's okay! She agreed to give me time to think about my options and we will talk in a week.
Ha. In a "week".
But I feel stronger for opening up. Maybe I'm not as weak as I thought, after all.
Today
I am once again participating in Five-Minute Friday.
On these posts, I follow the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(I'm getting better at revisiting them, too.)
This week's one-word is "Safe".
Timer starting...
I typically write about these word-prompts as they relate to my life here in Beijing. But as it happens this fits my devotional study. I am reading in the book of Exodus, and recently passed the point where the Israelites were given manna in the desert. They were only allowed to collect enough for each day (except the sabbath). That's it.
They were safe.
God was providing, each and every day.
He promised.
And if they kept too much overnight, it got maggots. Just to PROVE He would provide the next day and they could rely on him. When God's got your back, you are safe, if you rely on him.
As I read this familiar story, I couldn't help but wonder how I would do in that situation. How many bowls of maggoty manna would I find in the morning before I realized my food supply was safer in the hands of the Almighty?
My guess is, a lot.
I like to plan.
I like to know I have my food MORE than the morning that I intend to eat it...and what if I'm hungrier than usual one day? I need extra!
Trust that I am safe? That my food supply is safe? That my income is safe? That all are provided and waiting for me?
Whew. That's a tall order.
Done.
Today
I am participating in Five-Minute Friday (back from a holiday hiatus).
On these posts, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Breathe".
Timer starting...
I do a lot of yoga. A big part of that is focusing on your breath. So I've learned a thing or two.
I also meditate, and focusing on your breath is the best way to clear your mind. "Breathe in...breathe out..." doesn't really count as a thought, and focusing there helps random thoughts to pass on through instead of lingering.
Oddly, I don't hear a lot of talk about meditation among my Christian friends and family - maybe without the "Prayer and" before it, "meditation" sounds too Eastern, too Buddhist or Hindu or Eastern. I look at meditation as the oft-forgotten side of prayer.
If prayer is a conversation with God, why do we do all the talking? A few years ago, I realized that, when I meditate: when I breathe, sit still, and quiet my inner voice, I can listen more freely to God's part of our conversation.
We are blessed to serve a God who wants to be an integral part of our daily lives. He listens, yes, and He will guide, if we just stop, breathe, and hear Him.
Stop Timer.
Today I am participating in Five-Minute Friday (back from a holiday hiatus). On these posts, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Control".
Timer starting...
I don't think I'm a "control freak" but I am a planner. I make lists of what needs to be done, delegate if possible, get things done in advance as much as I can, and try to make things go smoothly. When I married a "pantster" - my word for someone who flies by the seat of their pants - we had to find compromise.
We love our road trips. We travel well together. So... if we are taking a trip for him, or to visit his friends, he makes whatever plans need made. If it is for me, or to visit my peeps, I determine what needs to be set in stone.
Our greatest example was a trip we took to one of my friends' wedding out in Utah. We wanted to make an adventure of it, so planned a week-long trip, flying into and out of Denver and renting a car. My trip - My timeline. I controlled ordering airplane tickets, renting a car, dates we stayed with my aunt, hotel reservations in Moab. Timeline?
Be at the airport by XXX time.
Be at hotel in Moab by XXX.
Be back at my aunt's house for supper on XX/XX/XX.
It worked beautifully. Between then, we visited a friend of his, stopped at whatever sites he decided on each day, and even made a mutual decision to stay one extra night in Moab before heading back.
Sometimes, relinquishing control can help you find adventures you might have missed!
...end timer.
Today I am participating in Five-Minute Friday (back from a holiday hiatus). On these posts, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Connect".
Timer starting...
When I saw this word a few days ago, I set it aside, to stew, as it were, in my brain. I have been quite low lately, and connecting with people was the furthest thing from my mind. People are the cause of all my problems!
But every Tuesday night I go "tutor" (read: play with) a 2yo Chinese girl whose parents want her exposed to more English from a native speaker. She is a bright spot in my week. We battle language barriers through play, and neither one of us care if the other doesn't truly get it - well, I am trying to teach something, a little bit, so I want her to learn, but it's not a critical thing like finding the right medicine without a translator.
The first few times I went to their house, if I touched her - tapping her to get her attention, or accidentally brushing her hand - she shied back a bit, pulled away. But her mama assured me she liked me, and that I was "doing better than the last teacher" so it was fine. I can play/teach without touching.
This week, she didn't shy away from me. She responded more, in speech, in eye contact, and even, when she started to fall, leaning on me for stability. She practically sat on my knee at one point.
We connected. And it was pretty cool.
It made me smile on the way home.
I've been so down, it was nice to find this nugget of joy.
Timer Stop.
Welcome to another rendering of Five-Minute-Friday! On these posts, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Now".
Timer starting...
Stop.
Just stop.
Stop whatever it is that you're doing.
Now listen.
Breathe.
What do you hear when you stop? Your refrigerator? Traffic outside? Kids in the next room?
What do you smell? Is something cooking? Is a window open? A fire burning?
Focusing on the moment is a wonderful technique to remember during the hectic time that December often is. People use this as a way to calm down during a panic attack (find things that you can identify with each of the five senses) or even for social anxiety.
Right now, what is familiar?
Right now, what can you focus on?
Right now, what is within your control?
Doing this daily, moment-by-moment (as I think of it) is sometimes called "mindfulness" and is definitely a good way to bring you back to NOW.
The future is uncertain.
The past is unchangeable.
All we have is Now.
Merry Christmas.
...Time's up.
Welcome to my Five-Minute-Friday of a Sunday! On these posts, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Joy".
Timer starting...
This is a really hard topic this week. Yes, I could write about the things that bring me joy on a day-to-day basis, but the reality is, I'm overall unhappy right now. Our jobs have come to a screeching halt, with a few random hours of work each week, for both me and my husband.
We usually enjoy talking about our plans for the future - things to do with our small apartment, trips to take, places we want to eat or take friends who may visit us. Lately though, we only talk about what we can't afford, and the fact that our November pay (coming to us soon) will have to be hoarded to pay for December bills.
When people who promise something (work, for example) fail to provide what was promised, the resulting emotion is definitely NOT "joy". What will happen to us? How will we eat? Will we ever have the financial independence that we are used to?
Questions crowd my brain to the point where the joy just cannot break through.
Time is up. Sorry to be a downer.
I'm kind of late to this ballgame, but we've had internet issues. Again, for today's post, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
(You have a whole week to get your post up.)
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Crave".
Timer starting...
What non-food thing do I crave? I crave peace. True peace in my heart.
I actually started a Mindfulness Challenge recently. "Mindfulness" is one of those ephemeral words that implies a bunch of mental mumbo-jumbo and visualization exercises that a lot of people can't get into. But it's working for me so far.
I set a goal that at the end of this challenge I would have accepted Beijing as home. I have, logically. My brain gets it. But sometimes, on a frustrating day, the fleeting thought of "if we were in the States" passes through my mind unbidden. Or I just miss things and people. I know we aren't moving, but my heart is not at truly peace.
So each day, I meditate on the thought that this is now my home, for at least a minute. And throughout the day, my "mindfulness" is about focus on the moment. What is actually happening around me here and now? How am I responding? How is my husband responding? What can I, literally, do about it?
It has been a great week. Instead of yearning for the future we dream of, or longing for a past that can never be again, I am slowly becoming more present in my actual life, and at those times my heart is truly, peaceful.
Time's Up!
For today's post, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home. This has been a good way to keep me on track posting somewhat regularly.
If
you want to join, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Surrender".
Timer starting...
Sometimes, the word-cue makes it difficult for me to narrow down my thoughts. In fact, my post today will simply be a list of different ideas "surrender" brings to mind, in no particular order:
~ I gave up a lot of control by getting rid of almost everything back home and moving to China two months ago.
~ Sometimes when we are out on errands, I simply surrender to my husband's wishes of what to do next or where to go. We may both have opinions, but if it doesn't matter in the long run, I say, "I'll do whatever you choose," and we continue happily. (He does the same for me.)
~ I have two contentious relationships with siblings that I have surrendered to prayer - we do not make direct contact, but I love them both and wish them good things.
~ My health is somewhat at the whim of Beijing: I walk a lot which is great; I eat more fresh and less processed foods, which is great; I watch the air quality daily, but don't always wear a mask when I should, so some days I'm blowing grey dust out of my nose (gross), which is not great; we have a terrible bed and I'm losing a lot of sleep, which is bad for my health.
~ Very recently, on a 24-hour train ride (an entire blog post in itself, which I intend to write next, so come back!), I surrendered to a panic attack when I awoke in the middle of the night, on my 3rd-tier bunk in a shared room, and could feel the ceiling closing in on me. I was up for 5 hours in the middle of the night, in increasingly cold (we were heading north) temperatures, rather than attempt to sleep in such close quarters.
~ I hate to keep harping on about all the changes from moving overseas, but it's basically the crux of my existence these days! Before moving, we prayed a lot and came to the conclusion that, as difficult as it would be, this was God's will, and we had to surrender to it.
Time's up. More than 5 minutes, actually. Sorrynotsorry!
For today's post, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home. This has been a good way to keep me on track posting somewhat regularly.
If
you want to join us, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Enjoy".
Timer starting...
When you're sick, this can be a hard word, and I'm trying to beat a cold right now - not enjoying that much! In the process, losing sleep - also the reverse of "Enjoy".
However, I am extremely blessed to have a wonderful husband who brings out the best in me, and who always finds the positive in everything. Since today is our one day-off together, we had planned to go to a major marketplace today, and we did, tired as I was.
Of course, I enjoyed it. It's been a glorious autumn day, warm enough that we decided to walk home, and even had our coats off by the halfway point. The sky is clear - no visible Beijing-smog! Another great gift to enjoy.
I enjoy getting out and walking. I do. It's one of my favorite forms of exercise, and here in Beijing, we do a lot of it. Left to my own devices, I might have skipped out on the exercise and missed a beautiful day.
The word prompt is "Enjoy" and today, I needed a little gentle prompting in order to fully Enjoy my day. We have come full circle.
...and Time.
For today's post, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home. This has been a good way to keep me on track posting somewhat regularly.
If
you want to join us, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are:
Write for 5 minutes.
Link
your post on hers.
It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Common".
Timer starting...
HAHA! Right now, as an American in China, I don't feel I have much in common with anyone around me! I'm prepping for a drama camp, and read about a team activity that suggested letting kids pick partners by some organic means like "find someone with eyes the same color as yours".
...In China? Um... think I'll skip that.
I'm 5'10", red hair, green eyes, caucasian, and I don't speak the language of those around me. I'm a Christian in a secular country. What could I possibly have in common with my neighbors?
A smile. A smile reads in any language.
Holding the elevator for someone struggling to get to it.
Holding any door!
Laughing over discovering a new word - or a language mistake.
Petting a dog.
Lifting my face to the sun.
Bobbing my head to the beat of the music - in any language.
Dancing
Making "yummy sounds" and rubbing my tummy.
It's there. What makes me human makes you human, no matter what our religion or politics, no matter the language or geography.
...Time's up.
Thank you, Kate, for this prompt! This was an enlightening thing to write off-the-cuff!
For today's post, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home. This has been a good way to keep me on track posting somewhat regularly.
If
you're interested in trying it, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are: Write for 5 minutes. Link
your post on hers. It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Journey".
Timer starting...
Moving to China was a challenge. It was a long journey through bureaucracy, before we even left the States, and that journey is ongoing.
But I have come to realize that the inner struggle is the hardest part.
I spent this morning in prayer, watching a worship service recorded from back home, because I have no spiritual support in my present location. I know that this journey is only beginning, and God has plans for my husband and I. We need to be here. We prayed a lot about this before making the decision.
Little things have been battering at my inner peace.
Things like getting sick and not having my usual medicines handy.
Insomnia has finally thrown me for a loop, making me even question my sanity.
Our small jar of peanut butter, as compared to the huge one we used to buy back home.
I cannot begin to guess what is to come. Our intention was to be here for years, as long as our health was fine. Perhaps God has other plans.
The journey is not easy, but it is not horrible, and it is not over. I just have to mentally condition myself to remember to praise God for all things, and trust.
Time's up.
Once again, I am following the one-word prompt from Kate at Heading Home. These are actually useful for me to find simple ways to convey my new life in Beijing.
If
you're interested in trying it, click that link to her blog. Every
Friday is a new word, and the only rules are: Write for 5 minutes. Link
your post on hers. It's pretty cool, and I find a new blog every week.
(Now if only I would make the time to revisit more often during the week.)
This week's one-word is "Eat".
Timer starting...
We eat well.
The night we arrived in Beijing, we were treated to "Beijing Duck" (Beijing = formerly Peking) and many other tasty foods. Since then, Brett and I have tried numerous street vendors, found unique packaged goods in our grocery store, but not much in the way of typical junk food.
So we eat well. We eat more healthy food than we did in the states. No pizza (no oven), no popcorn (they make it sweet), only the occasional fast food.
We are not starving, even though my pants are little looser since our arrival a month ago. Our first home-cooked meal in our own apartment, I took a picture and said, "We won't starve!" because there are fruit and veggie vendors out along our back street, and the smallest bag of rice available is huge for us. So at the very least, we can cook up some veggies and rice.
Make no mistake, the food here is NOT like your typical American Chinese restaurant. We eat delicious, bready breakfast dumplings, or the Beijing cross between a crepe and a burrito, right on the street.
But we eat. God has seen fit to provide for us, once again.
