Tiny World Tuesday

The world isn't tiny. It's big. And full of people. Eight billion and counting! And they're everywhere!

We all (well, I) try to carve out my own space. We all have totally unique stories. No two people have been to all the same places and seen all the same things.

When I was a kid, we lived in Sri Lanka. For a while, I went to a school in neighboring India. It's an international school, so many people all over the world have attended there.

And last night, I met one of them!

I belong to a book club in town, and they choose award-winning books, or classic books that are infrequently read, books from lists of "must read" books. The last book was about the Sri Lankan civil war that was happening - or peaked, or started? - while I lived there. So I couldn't possibly skip out.

One member of our group is Indian. She doesn't live in town, so she's not at every meeting. During the course of discussing the book, my connection to Sri Lanka and southern India came out. After the meeting, as we were all leaving, she pulled me aside and asked, "That wasn't Kodaikanal, was it?"

Yes. The school I attended for a few years in the 1980s was Kodaikanal International School.

The school she attended for a few years in the mid 1990s was Kodaikanal International School. 

Somehow, we two former students of a K-12 school in southern India both happened to land up in central Vietnam 30-40 years later. In this big wide world full of people, what are the odds? And not just that we are both here, but that we both opted to join this particular book club!

Tuesday Tricks of the Trade

...but I mean, is blogging a "trade"? Regardless.

It's March. Which means April is around the corner. (See how astute I am?) Which means it's time to decide about the A to Z blogging challenge. (because I'm a planner.)

Actually, by the end of last year's A-to-Z, I had an idea for a theme for 2023, so the decision was half-made already. " 美中不足 " (Měizhōngbùzú) (a Chinese idiom roughly translated to "the fly in the ointment" but more literally meaning "beauty inside no enough".) is that I have gotten busier lately. Time, annoyingly, continues to pass at its regular pace, whether I have more or less to do each day.

I'm doing a little more online teaching, which requires extra preparation. I still need to be accessible whenever things happen at our little school that might require my attention. As we grow, that happens more often. I even went to one of the events we held at a public school, to observe and get some pictures for social media.

If I want to do A-to-Z this year, I'm going to have to pull out some of the tricks I've used in the past - which a lot of the participants habitually do - and schedule posts in advance.

I did some math the other day and figured out how many more posts I need to write in advance in order to feel ready to go for it. Some posts will be repeats from this past year. (As I said, I had my theme in mind in May already, so I've been practicing.) 

Theme reveal time is next week. I don't usually participate (because I forget about it) but I've put it in my planner. If I can get enough posts set up, you'll find out next week!  

Tradition Tuesday

(I had to flip the wording order in the title, because "Tuesday Tradition" sounds like a tradition performed on Tuesdays. Which this isn't.)

Monday we were invited to a Death-iversary dinner. Our landlord stopped by in the morning to say that the guy a few doors down - a friend, talented wood-worker, we've bought custom furniture from him - was having a Death-iversary dinner at 11 and we were invited. This is a Vietnamese tradition to honor their dead family members. 

We got there a little early, because we are punctual Americans and still after almost five years unaccustomed to the fact that a given time is actually a roundabout number and not precise. The people hosting it own a... villa? homestay? hotel-ish set of bungalows? During Covid the property slipped into disarray but we wandered the property and saw the signs of new work beginning as they get it back up to proper shape. They have some guests now, but I don't know how many rooms are even really ready for guests. 

I know there are guests because by the time people started sitting at the newly set up tables full of catering, two more foreign couples showed up. One couple for sure is staying there, but they'll be leaving soon. They had questions about this event:  

Is there a presentation or speech? 

Are we supposed to do something or bring something? 

The answers: No, and no. The tradition is to share food with as many living family members and friends as possible. The greater the number of people enjoying themselves and eating well, the greater the honor for the deceased person. (As I understand it)

So our table had Brett and myself, the French couple staying there, another foreign couple (I think she might be a guest there) a Japanese visitor, an Australian guy who's lived here for years, and three Vietnamese people. We were the English speaking table.

When the food slowed down, we were ready to go. (It's truly just about lunch. Even people who are working just come in when they can from work, eat out of respect to the family, and then return to work.) Brett teaches Monday night, and after the beers served with lunch, he wanted to have a nap before tackling students. 

But we got home and he said, "I kind of feeling like going for a ride!" So we did. It didn't take long to realize that it was getting too cold for a motorbike ride. It was supposed to rain all day, but the rain had so far held off. By now I wanted something sweet, and I had only had one cup of coffee before lunch, so I had him drop me at my favorite coffee shop for a coconut coffee. He drove off and I sat there and wrote this.

After my delicious coffee I walked home. 

It started to rain.

I think it will be a cold week.

Try Anything Tuesday

Hey there, happy people!

I tried a new thing today. Have you heard of Reiki? It's a Japanese energy healing technique. I just so happen to have a friend here who is a Reiki practitioner. I've known her for a couple years but it never really appealed to my logical brain.

Then this fall, I did something to my shoulder - slept wrong? I don't know. For a while it was distractingly painful, but not debilitating. Then, throughout the rainy season the pain would come and go. It hasn't been as bad for a while, but I can't sleep on my left side.

It turns out, a friend of mine back in the US goes to reiki regularly. (I don't know the verbs. "does" reiki? "Has reiki done to her"?) She sent me an article about how it has been used with some success to treat pain and trauma. Bingo.

So today, I had my first reiki session. Afterward I was told to pay attention to how I feel over the next few days, starting with today. Here's what I wrote today about the session:

Took my brain a while to relax. "Am I doing this right? Where should my hands be? What do other people do?" I felt her warm pressure in various places, but no emotion or build-up.

Tried to relax.

Tried to relax.

Trying is the antithesis of relaxing. Let my mind wander. I wondered what was happening, and associated different touch points with different chakras.

Did I doze off? I noticed a prayer-like lifting sensation. My hands felt they were rising (they weren't). My body felt lifted and pulled like taffy (it wasn't). Then I know I dozed. The place where my body was (head-to-toe) became a pool of shifting colors. Liquid violet, red, pink - jewel tones in a sea of darkness. As if someone was pouring swirls of paint together. Next I was a pool of milky-liquid (like that one Doctor Who episode).

After I thought I heard a rain storm starting (wasn't happening), I was conscious of myself again. My hand slipped involuntarily. I had a coughing fit for no reason.

Afterward, she told me the coughing thing is not uncommon as the body releases toxins through the process. She said to drink water, and that I'll probably want to go to bed early tonight.

I was so thirsty. 

Hours later, at home, after drinking more water, I felt light-headed.

When I sat to work at my computer, it felt like I'd had an injection in my shoulder.

I should explain, she knew my issues were insomnia, joint pain, and "a shoulder" but not which one. My shoulder hasn't been acting up lately, either. When we finished, she said she kept being drawn to my left ankle, and asked if I had injured that sometime in the past. No, but for the past couple weeks that ankle has felt bruised. A mild pain, so I never mentioned it.

Weird!

Old Year New Year - Tuesday Truths

Technically it's Wednesday, but I forgive myself. 

It's that time of year when everyone looks at what they did in the past year and sets goals for the next. So let's just take a peek, shall we?

In 2022, I read 32 books. It would be more, if I added in all the plays I read for my old theatre group, but I didn't bother because I'd hit the mark.

In 2022 I exercized over 300 hours. Not too bad. I usually get in 40-50 minutes a day. Some days more, some less. Yoga everyday, some cardio, some others, some cycling. This is tracked through my phone, so the steps (not shown here, except for in the distance) are inaccurate. 

In 2022 I watched 104 movies. I don't track them electronically, though, so there's no quantifying genres or lengths. I will say we definitely boost the Horror numbers in October.

In 2022 we flew to Hanoi twice, but other than that didn't travel much at all. I'm hoping to do more traveling in 2023.

So what's up for 2023? Things are always changing. We'll just have to see how the year plays out.

Happy new year!

Tuesday Time Management

I read an article recently about preventing dementia and alzheimers. (The article popped up in the automatic news feed on my new phone, and it's gone now, so I can't cite the source, sorry.) It's the same stuff I've read before: basically, be healthy. (duh) But one pointer hit me differently.

I knew that doing puzzles - doing things that exercise your brain - is a good way to help prevent these types of diseases, but this article specifically stated that doing puzzles isn't what helps: learning new things is what helps. 

When your brain is learning something, new connections are made. When the brain is active, it prevents stagnancy (my word - again, I can't find the article anymore). 

Well, I'm studying languages, so that counts. I'll tick that box off the list.

That got me thinking, if it's about connecting things in the brain in a different way to keep it active, what about "learning" that's not traditional learning? Not studying a new skill, but just doing things differently? 

I am a creature of habit. Especially in the morning I have several tasks to be done, in a specific order, before I can decide what's my first thing to do that day - sit at my laptop, go to the market, have coffee out at a cafe? Routine, according to the article, also allows the brain to get lazy. We don't want a lazy brain!

So for the last few days I'm doing things differently. I've gotten up and dived into writing before anything else. I've watched comedy shorts on YouTube instead of meditating first thing. I'm being more social (gasp!). I think I even joined a book club! (I went, once, and they are just starting a new book that I can read if I want to join the discussion at the next meeting. So I guess that means I've joined. It's not like there's a sign-up.)

I'm exhausted. But I think it's a good thing. 

What do you think? I wish I could link up the article, even though most of it was stuff we've probably all read before, but do you think "learning" could be taken as "learning to do the same things in a different way"? It surely can't hurt.

Tuesday Trials - Wednesday Edition

"Insomnia Energy"

That's my new phrase that I just coined yesterday.

Have you ever had insomnia so bad for days and days, and each morning you tell yourself, "It's fine - I'll take a nap later," but then later comes and you just... Don't?

Insomnia Energy.

You go through your day as usual, not dragging, maybe even amped up. Then at night it happens again and the next morning you think, "Well, maybe I'll nap today," but you still just ... Don't?

Insomnia Energy.

For over a week now I've been running on 3-5 hours of sleep a night, and occasionally on those days I might doze for a half-hour or so while reading a book in the afternoon. I feel tired in the evening, but then don't sleep properly. (No stress, just an old injury from a car accident flaring up.)

Meanwhile, I'm getting over 2,000 words every day for Nanowrimo. I go walking or riding to the store or a coffee shop as usual. Keep the house clean. Life is just ... normal! Like the sleep deprivation isn't even happening at all!

I wonder how long this will last...

Tuesday Truth

Short post today. I'm curious about families.

On a TV show I was watching recently, two kids were abducted. The older brother took care of his sister as well as he could, even including holding her tightly when she was scared. The little girl clung on to her brother any time she could. She trusted him and followed his directions to try to save them both.

Then there were the two grown up siblings in a sitcom who always share their troubles and advice.

I cannot imagine being that close to any of my [four] siblings. The closest I was to a sibling, she flat out told me one time - before I told a story about a night of partying - "my sister doesn't do that" so I didn't tell the story. We don't want to know all the good, bad, and ugly about each other. We love each other, but kind of at an arm's length, I guess.

Of course, there's the movie "The Good Son" and other examples of horrible siblings.

It seems in movies and TV, either siblings are devoted to each other or horrible/estranged. It seems off. Even when my little brother had no contact with us for eight years, after he and his two tiny daughters re-entered our lives, we all pitched in to help with the kids while he sorted out the logistics of moving, living, working. He truly seemed flummoxed when I responded, "Of course. You're family," to his thanks.

We come together and stand up for each other. We love each other. But other than jobs and maybe church stuff, I couldn't tell you how any of my siblings spend their time. 

Are we weird? If you have siblings, are you close? Are you distant? Or do you relate to my perspective that "we love each other, but don't want to live up each other's butt"?

Tuesday Typeset - Book Review III

Last week I finished an awesome book I highly recommend.

The Speed of Dark by Elizabeth Moon. 

It's a fascinating story told from the perspective of an adult with autism. It was published in 2002, and is set in the "near-future" - so, sort of sci-fi? - although the setting is very normal, modern, USA. With one exception: no one is born autistic anymore. Our narrator (primary narrator, others pick up the tale in some scenes) is a grown adult, born before the miracle cure was created. 

Wait... futuristic medicine... Yes, I guess this qualifies as sci-fi. It just doesn't read like sci-fi.

It reads like a story about a man who is considered disabled, works in a job with other "autists" (word from the book) in a department of a large corporation where specific tasks are suited to these rare abilities. He deals with bias from his boss, misunderstandings from some "normal" friends, but treated as a normal friend by others. 

I love the way the author got into some specifics of difficulties he has. He has to talk to the police at one point, and one of the officers doesn't understand why he gets tongue-tied, but we as the reader are in his head, hearing why the frustration prevents words from coming. It's impossible not to feel empathy and compassion, and to want to do better in my own life.

I won't give away any plot points, because I highly recommend this to anyone. Especially anyone who touches on the autistic world from the outside. I have a niece and a nephew on the spectrum, so I want to know more, but I don't deal with it on a daily basis.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Tuesday Typhoon!

Today we receive our first typhoon of the season!

As I write this, there's just a little light rain outside. Windows and doors are open, electricity is on; all is well. Last night we read that this typhoon was due to make landfall an hour ago or so. (Monday evening, US time.)

Typhoon Noru! You might have heard about it on your evening world news. (Then again, maybe not. I know other big storms are cropping up that might be closer to you.) If it didn't lose strength crossing the East Sea, this was due to be the biggest storm to hit Vietnam EVER!

I guess that's why I'm using all the exclamation points. It's big news! 

Last night's report said it would make landfall in either our town - Hoi An - or another city in our same province, at around 7am today. In that report, wind speeds were expected to be 165-185kph. That sounds really high! I try to be as metric as I can, since I live in the metric world, but kph... hmm. A quick search told me 165 was about 100mph.

Okay, that's better. In my time living in Delaware, I've seen hurricanes of up to 120+mph. At least now I had a frame of reference.

That was last night.

This morning, the latest is that Noru hung about catching her breath in between the Philippines and here. She is now due to strike our coast later this evening, at 183kph (113mph). I'm happy with that, because again, been there, done that... BUT "been there, done that" in a country where buildings are built with hurricane safety measures. Where houses are slightly more spaced out. Where there is infrastructure to prevent catastrophic flooding. So now I'm just curious what this will look like here.

I do believe the houses around us are strong - brick and poured concrete - and I know the city has been improving the flood drainage in the past few years. But it's the human error that causes trouble, isn't it? The new guy across the street from us just embellished his house with a lovely balcony, and framed it in potted and hanging plants. Yesterday, while the rest of us were bringing in outside furniture and tying back tall plants, he didn't. I'm anxiously watching for the moment he takes his 12 potted plants and 9 hanging ones inside!

I'm waiting for one of those potted plants to go flying.

 

The market was lively yesterday, and everyone seemed very happy. Vendors were happy to be selling as much as possible before having to close for two or three days. Customers were happy because they were getting stocked up. Kids were happy because a typhoon means no school.

We're good. We're well-stocked. I cooked a Vietnamese chicken and rice dish last night so we have a bunch of leftovers in case the power goes out. Our stove is propane, so even without electricity we can still fry an egg or boil noodles. Our garden umbrella is down. Plants are tied back. The hammock and its frame are folded up and stored inside. I know the rules. Been there, done that.

Love our landlord for tying back the plants!

Since I started writing this, the rain has picked up but the wind is still minimal. Motorbikes are still passing on the street. Rain or not, this is still the calm before the storm.

So now, we wait...

Tuesday (ish) Truth

"Truth" as in "This is what I believe is true." I do not have 100% proof as to the factuality of what I am about to relate. Here we go:

I think I had a heart attack recently. It was a few weeks ago, and since I wasn't about to go to the hospital, I'm not really telling people about it. This blog is anonymous,  so I've decided to put it out here for posterity, in case something else happens later.

Here is what happened:

I was washing dishes, and suddenly felt strong pressure, as if someone was pressing their fist - or the wide end of a baseball bat - into my sternum. I leaned on the counter for a moment, but it didn't go away. The pressure started climbing up my chest, slowly. I was having trouble catching my breath, so I retreated to the bedroom to recline in the cool dark. Maybe that would help.

The pressure grew up to my throat, and I focused on breathing. At this point, tears were coming to my eyes because I was confused and in pain. But I didn't want to panic over nothing, so I worked on relaxing as much as I could. 

Gradually, the pressure eased and my breath came more easily. I waited a few more minutes to calm myself and take some deep breaths, before returning to the kitchen. During this time, I think I started laughing at myself: Was it a heart attack? Was it a gas bubble? SO OFTEN on TV and in movies, someone thinks they are having a heart attack, go to the hospital, undergo a battery of tests, only to find out that there was just a big gas bubble or some other harmless thing. 

I'm not going to do that! Seriously? Pay for a hospital visit and testing to find out what? A)Yes, you had a heart attack. Now you must alter your life in these ways. Or B) No, it wasn't a heart attack, but you should alter your life in these ways. 

Not worth it, IMHO.

Here's the thing, people. I am genetically highly likely to have a "cardiac event". On a scale of 0-3, my bloodwork came up a 9. My blood pressure is LOW; my cholesterol is healthy. I eat healthy. (Since moving to Vietnam, I have a diet high in turmeric and garlic, both good for the heart.) I exercise regularly. My heart situation is purely courtesy of my dad and his dad and others who came before.

After finding out I was a cardiac risk years ago, I started a pinterest board for heart health. After this "heart attack" I looked through symptoms common in women. Apart from the obvious ones that I felt in that moment, during the weeks leading up to a heart attack, many women complain of: 

• Insomnia ✔
• Excess fatigue. ✔ 
• Nausea. ✔ I don't often feel nausea, but shortly before this I had felt it during some of my yoga workouts. 
• Many women also mention a high stressor leading up to the event. ✔ (Not relevant to dredge up here.)

So, I think I had a heart attack. I'll happily continue on in ignorance of the medical truth, just with this personal truth in my head, and will watch for the next one.

Tuesday Twist!

So, you know we started an English center. Recently parents have been pulling their kids out of classes. We heard that some parents were concerned that their kids' grades weren't going up. ...Which makes no sense because our classes started on June 8th, so there have been no school grades to compare, and we only recently got to the point of doing the first tests/assessments within our own curriculum.

(Personally, I think those parents are trying to make an excuse so they don't have to tell their dear friend - our local business partner - that they don't want to pay for classes.)

Anyway, we listen. We want to address parental concerns. So we decided to offer "Homework Help" once a week. A non-class period of time when kids can come in to the school and get assistance with their English homework from a native English speaker - myself and my husband Brett. This is a trial for this month, to gauge interest.

Honestly, because I think the parents are making up this complaint, I thought "Homework Help" would not be popular. But at least we could say we offer it!

Twist!

Sunday was our first "Homework Help" time. One kid was there before we even arrived. Another came shortly thereafter.

Then a MOB of kids (eleven, to be exact) came in the doors. WHAT!?!

Oops - another twist! It turned out these were some of our students whose parents wanted them to take an assessment test to see whether they could be moved up to a higher level. (It was poorly scheduled by front office staff. The students should have been at staggered times.)

So I stayed with the two Homework kids and Brett did the testing. Then one more girl came for Homework Help, but she hadn't brought her book or notebook or anything. I think she had been asked to come in by one of our staff, just to show interest. 

All told, there were four kids at Homework Help on our first day. That's four more than we expected. And two are loosely connected with staff members, so I'm guessing there were only two students who genuinely wanted help.

I hope we helped them. It was kind of chaotic and loosey-goosey. I'll be interested to see what happens next week.

Maybe I should gently suggest that our staff do NOT feed us students. Kids who have legitimate issues are not getting the help they could if our time is split between them and these forced kids. Am I wrong? What would you do?

Tuesday Typeset - Book Report Two

A week ago I finished reading an older book that I'd never heard of:

Things Fall Apart, by Chinua Achebe

When I bought my Kindle, it came preloaded with a bunch of books, and this was one of them. I knew nothing about it. During brunch one day, I made a short list of short books that were on my Kindle, that I could read quickly to help meet my Goodreads reading goal for 2022. At just a little over 200 pages, this was one of them. 

Only today, as I did a search for the cover art, did I learn that it was published in 1958!

It's timeless, because it takes place prior to and during the colonization of Africa. That's as specific as it gets. We know it's in Africa, but not where in Africa. We know that it was a long time ago because of old traditions, lack of technology, and lack of global influence in the characters' lives during the first half of the book.

I don't want to say too much, because I highly recommend reading it. It's banned in some places, or at least it was banned. It's a short, easy read, with a rich story. Especially if you appreciate other cultures. If you don't like reading about lands foreign to you, maybe you wouldn't like it.

That's all I'm willing to say because I don't want to give anything away. To me, it was a fascinating look at a time and place I could never imagine.

 

Tuesday Tirade - TV Tastes

There's a new Game of Thrones show out, which means there's a new crop of "I'm proud to say I've never watched ..." social media posts. 

I've seen posts of this nature for GOT,

for Tiger King,

for the Kardashians,

and other shows I can't think of off the top of my head.

It seems like a weird kind of snobbery. Who cares what you don't watch? Sometimes people go online and ask for recommendations of new shows or movies to watch, but I have never seen anyone ask what they shouldn't watch. (Unless they're asking ironically, to bait the trolls.)

It's probably just a sign of the times. Or a sign of the division inherent with a lot of social media. No discussion can follow a blatant "you are a moron for watching this" post. In real life, if I happened to say something about GOT to someone who hadn't watched it, they might very calmly say, "Oh, I haven't seen it." I don't know. It's never happened yet. It's all on social media.

During Covid, Tiger King was all the rage. Popular opinion is that the boredom of lockdowns had a lot to do with its popularity. Brett watched it. Which means it was often on in the same room with me. I watched the first couple episodes, and decided it wasn't my cup of tea. Still, I'd sit down while it was on sometimes. Why all the rage against a TV show? Or against people finding entertainment in true-crime drama? (Because that's what it is.)

I hadn't intended to watch Game of Thrones, either. I knew it was based on an unfinished series of books. (and honestly, the books are really fat and the covers looked boring.) One day a few years ago, Brett and I were talking about what to watch that night, and I said, "I feel like watching something with dragons," to which he said, "Hey! I'm pretty sure that Game of Thrones show has dragons in it!" So we started the series and liked it well enough to keep going.

I am a snob in my own right, but generally I keep it to myself. In my life I have considered myself a coffee snob, a beer snob, and yes, a movie snob.

But I'm older and wiser now. What you think is good coffee is fine, just please don't make me drink it! 

I still feel that I'm a beer snob, but I drink a lot of cheap Asian beer anyway. 

I've married someone with very different taste in movies than I prefer, and he is a bit snobby about it, as I am. (sorry Brett) BUT we make it work and we respect each other and can have a civilized discussion about our very different tastes.

So basically, with age I've learned the wisdom that everyone is different, and as long as they aren't hurting people, their choices are their own. What someone watches doesn't hurt you, so stop being a snob about it!

Tuesday Tardiness (Wednesday)

Yes, yes, I missed yesterday. I'm missing a lot of days, but that's okay.

I wanted to follow up from last week, since I expressed a lot of mixed emotions about my recent interactions with our new neighbor.

We had coffee together, out at a coffee shop, just the two of us. As I expected, it went well. I learned about her life, her past, found out a bit more about her situation, and just had a pleasant time. She is a devoted mother, going through a divorce, and working from home. 

She did not spend the time on her cell phone, as she did when she came to our house. However, after about a half hour or so of talking, she pulled the phone out to show me a picture of something, and soon I was immersed in picture after picture of her kids. Just the little ones. Who I know already.

Now, I like her kids. They are sweet girls. But I'm not, in general, a "kid person". They are fine. But I know what her kids look like. In this case - two little girls under the age of three - they haven't changed a lot. Most of the pictures looked the same to me, but we saw picture after picture after picture. 

She really loves her kids. It's sweet, how happily she will spend 20 minutes just flipping through the pictures. Kind of how - back in the day - old people would pull out photo albums and tell their grandkids all about each and every photo.

Anyway, we saw her again out in the street by our house the other night, and I've invited her to a wellness event I like to go to. We're still friends, and boundaries have been established. I think all is well.

Now excuse me, I have to go lie down. I've been way too social in these last couple weeks, so I'm always exhausted.

Tuesday Tales - #IntrovertProblems

Oops! I'm a day late.

I'm way off this week. It's been exhausting. We have new neighbors. She's as social as I am introverted.

Let me be clear: I like this woman. She's nice, she seems intelligent (although we haven't had any deep conversation yet), her kids are nice... I know she's reaching out and trying to make more friends in the community, so I'm being as social as I can, but there comes a point when I crash. I'm "out of spoons" if you know the Spoon Theory.

First, we'd see her in the street. Or see the nanny bouncing the baby on her knee in their front portico. The baby loves Brett. Of course she does; all children do. The toddler loves him too, but we don't see her as often.

Then, one day, our gate was open and she and the baby came over.

Cultural note: In Vietnam - or at least in this area - if you're home, everything is open. Windows and doors, to keep the air flowing in the tropical summer. The gate, if you're open to guests (I suppose. That's how I read it anyway.) During Covid, we were pretty diligent about keeping the gate shut, but we're more relaxed now.

So she and the baby came into the house. { This is extremely unusual! We do not entertain! } We all sat in the living room, the baby mostly interacting with Brett. There was some conversation, but she was easily distracted by her phone. I know she works "online" so I imagine she must be working all the time.

It was nice and friendly. I had a positive feeling after that interaction.

The next day, she came over with the baby and another little girl ("my maid's niece"). I was in the back room, relaxing in the bean bag with a book, when Brett came back to inform me that "we have guests". So I abandoned my book and did my hostess-ly duty to come and be social. The neighbor was more on her phone this time, but still social.

Two days later, she came over with the baby and the toddler. I was working on my computer, but abandoned my work to sit and be social. She was on her phone most of the time.

By now, I believe Brett has inadvertently taken the role of surrogate father. Maybe the dad travels, maybe they're divorced - not my business - but commandeering my husband so your baby can get snuggles is not cool. ... if that's what's going on. I don't know! She's on her phone all the time!

The other night, we came home late and she was sitting by her gate. Seeing us pull up she immediately invited us over for coffee. We declined because at that hour we'd never sleep. The next morning I woke to a message on my phone inviting me to join her for coffee. I do not answer any messages (unless urgent, from family) until after I've done my meditation, exercise, and usually not until I'm dressed and ready for the day. This time, after my workout, I messaged back to suggest that she and I go out for coffee later this week. 

I'm looking forward to our coffee tomorrow. Maybe, away from children and husband, we can actually talk. Really, I want to be a good neighbor. I do value having a friendly neighbor. We just need to establish boundaries. Especially because my "office" is out in the open plan living-dining-kitchen area, so I'm visible from the street. I need it to be known that my being visible doesn't mean that I am available.

Brett can set his own boundaries. If he wants to walk the street with a 1yo in his arms for 20 minutes in the afternoon, that's his business.

...Re-reading this, I realize I've painted a very negative picture. I'm not going to edit it: these are my first impressions. As I've said, she's nice, smart, and I look forward to getting to know her better... but my introverted nature can't hold up under constant social bombardment.

Tuesday Trauma - And Then And Then And Then

Whew! I have good reasons for being absent lately, but I hope I'll be back soon. (not really "trauma" but, well, read on.)

You know about the bike accident. That was on a Monday.

And Then... that Friday we were called in for our 4th Covid shot. So I was standing around in a crowded "line" for an hour, trying not to get jostled. Walking was okay by then - slight limp - but if I stepped wrong or was bumped and twisted, I felt a twinge in that pulled tendon area. So I was a bit tentative and probably easily irritated. Plus it was hot and crowded.

And Then... we had set an appointment at a tattoo studio for the 25th. That was one week after injury and I was sitting and holding my leg still for about two hours. This appointment had been set a month ago. It wasn't too bad, didn't strain my injury much, but meant being upright and not elevating it for that time. I was still in the "rest and elevate" part of recuperating. So I rested it more in the coming days. Good thing I had planned to rest and not go too far afield, because things got worse. Not the leg, just in general...

(And Then...) It had actually started Monday morning, when I woke with a sore throat. Of course. Covid vaccine, Covid symptoms. I hadn't had too much pain around the injection site and counted myself lucky. Not so lucky, it turns out! The sore throat faded that Monday, and didn't keep me from my appointment, but the next day and the next were worse. And then the lungs (a bit), and then the sinuses. Stupid Pfizer. This mess is annoying! Astra-Zeneca was kind to me!

And Then... The daughter of an old colleague of mine from my theatre in Delaware has been in Vietnam a couple weeks, and this past Sunday they made it to my town! So of course we had to meet up so I could show off some of my favorite places! This lovely, fun, interesting woman was a kid when I was in Delaware, so I "knew" her, but only in the way a 20-something "knows" the kids that participate in an event with them. I think we were in Oliver! together, and maybe one of the Christmas shows. It was fun to catch up, but it became a very, very late night for us old fogeys!

And Then... Since the Covid jab side-effects started, I have not had a decent night's sleep even once. Well, maybe once. I thought I was out of the woods until I stayed out past midnight with the youngsters. Now I'm back on the insomnia circuit.

July has never been my favorite month. It's just traditionally not kind to me. Do you have a good or bad month of the year?

Now it's August. I have high hopes.

Tuesday Titles: Stranger Things

Have you watched Stranger Things on Netflix? Wildly popular.

 

I watched season 1, and really enjoyed it. My horror-movie-buff husband has gotten me into these kind of "strange" shows.

Season 2 was clearly written on the hype from season 1. Slightly less shock-and-awe, IMHO.

Season 3 lost me somewhere along the line. 

When season 4 came out, I told Brett, "You can watch that without me." We have a few shows that we watch together - wait for each other to be available and in the mood, etc. - and we each have shows that we can watch when the other is otherwise occupied. It works for us.

What you must understand is that my desk is in our open plan kitchen/dining/living area. So when he's watching TV during the day, 9 times out of 10 my headphones are on to ignore it. But I've also gotten into  the Pomodoro technique, which means getting up and taking a break every 25-30 minutes. So during my breaks and pacing the living area, I've caught bits of Season 4. Looks intriguing.

The other day Brett informed me that Season 4 is a million times* better than Season 3, the season which put me off the series. 

*hyperbole. I don't remember if he used any number, but he liked it better so far.

So today, when he watched season 4, episode 5, I sat with him from beginning to end. And now, while he works in the evenings I play catch up.

But each episode is over an hour long! Good grief. How do people watch so much TV these days?

Tuesday Tirade

I am livid.

I recently joined a writing group, and found that I enjoy it. It's nice to write and getting immediate feedback. So I've been regular there for three weeks.

Yesterday, one woman - I'll call her Karen - came in and announced that her daughter has Covid. Her grown adult daughter who lives with her. The daughter had tested positive a week ago, but Karen had not gone to get tested yet. I don't know why not.

Two of us put on masks after hearing that, but no one left. In my mind, I was thinking, "This is a responsible adult. I know they have a large, 3-bedroom house. Maybe the daughter is self-isolating. Because surely she wouldn't come to the group otherwise."

Tonight, she posted in the groups chat that she has Covid.

Livid!

I believe Covid has a 3-day incubation period. (Yes? No?) So on Thursday I'll go get tested. I pray that I will be negative. I wore my mask, except for when I was taking a drink of coffee or water. I hope it was enough. But that was yesterday. If it wasn't enough, it's too late now!

Livid! Who does that? Irresponsible, careless people, that's who.

Tuesday Tidbits

Not so much a "Tuesday Tale" this week. More of a catching up.

There are no stories to tell, just life happening. 

SOCIAL
I've been more social lately, which is weird and will have to balance out somehow. Two things:

1. Writing Group: I joined a writing group in my area. They meet weekly at a coffee shop that's a two minute bike ride from my house. We write, read what we've written, and give and receive feedback. The feedback is very helpful. Probably because it's coming from people who don't know me very well.

2. Wellness Wednesdays: I should list this first, because I did this one first, and the woman who runs Wellness Wednesdays invited me to the writing group. Wellness Wednesdays consists of an hour or so of low-key connection, meditation, a little aroma therapy, discussion, and maybe lunch. It's sounds weird, but it really is a great moment of calm in the middle of a hectic week. She varies the location, though, so I don't go regularly, just when it's near me.

WORK
Speaking of "hectic weeks".

Opening a new business is a lot of work! Classes began last week at our new school. The classes themselves are fine, but like any new business, we are finding some kinks to work out. Nothing major. Mostly logistical things and details like managing the time between classes, keeping kids where they are supposed to be, scheduling, timing of getting materials ready for each class. All the stuff you don't think of until you're in action. (Well, some things I had thought of, but seemed beyond my purview.) 

Now I'm taking over scheduling. Just to keep it organized and manageable for the staff, and to take one thing off Brett's plate. He's been shouldering most of the responsibility.

BOOKS

Ah yes, the times between the chaos. Last month I finished Midnight's Children by Salman Rushdie, and although it was okay, it wasn't my cup of tea. Could he please just tell a straight story? This was so convoluted it drove me crazy. I was interested in the characters, but had very little idea what the point was throughout much of it. Still, I didn't put it down. If a book bothers me too much, I will not waste my time with it. I'm glad I read it.

...Glad I read it, but wanted to read something straightforward again. Who writes in a straightforward manner? One thing leads to another to another, until the end? Stephen King. So I read Firestarter. Tbh, we recently watched the original movie, quickly followed by the new one (a disaster) so it was on by mind. Great read, easy read. I would even say, for people who've never read King because they're afraid his books might be too dark or scary, this would be a good one to start with. Not really scary, not gory, just a great thriller.

I finished Firestarter a couple days ago, and almost picked another King, but decided to go lighter and started reading Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty. I've read two of hers so far, and she has a nice, easy-reading style. I'm only a few chapters in, but so far I'm enjoying this book!

And that's my life - work, social, and books. I can't even believe "social" is a category of my life now! What about you? Busy summer or relaxed? Any book recommendations?