Love and February

For the first time ever, I am in love, in February. No matter how many times a day Brett and I say "I love you", I still think Valentine's Day is a crock.I'm reposting what I wrote last year on the subject, because aside from the "being single" part, I still feel the same way.

Some of you may not have seen this post from last year anyway, so I don't feel bad about a re-post.

I give you: February 13, 2012...

I’m not a fan of Valentine’s Day and it has nothing to do with being “alone” which is my choice, or being “reminded that I don’t have anyone” or anything like that. I don’t wear black in protest, or mourning, or whatever that’s supposed to signify.

Here’s my deal: It’s NOT ROMANTIC, homies! St. Valentine was a martyr! While incarcerated he wrote notes to the jail-keeper’s daughter and signed them “your” – as was common even in Jane Austen’s day – which gave us the phrase “your Valentine”. …at least that’s the popular one of many saints Valentine. February 14 celebrates the date of his burial. Happy Valentine’s Day, ya’ll!

Besides, if you love someone, do you really need a special day to tell them? Haven’t you already told them? Don’t you show them in myriad ways? If not, shame on you. Doing something special on Valentine’s Day is a cop-out. How much nicer when it’s a surprise for no reason!

So okay, a lot of people might appreciate a “gimme” holiday that basically tells you what to do and how to celebrate. Fine. But really? Named after - and celebrated on -  the day a MARTYR was BURIED? Let’s call it what it is: Happy “Hallmark Totally Made This Up” Day. Or, my personal favorite: Happy “Anniversary of the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre” Day. Heehee. Did I mention I used to live in Chicago?

I’m wracking my brain, and I don’t think I’ve actually been in a relationship on the fake holiday. But then, if I was involved with someone who decided to “do something special” on that day, I would probably get up and walk out of the restaurant, or otherwise ruin all the careful planning. Because really, if we’re together, you KNOW this about me. You KNOW I find this holiday trite and phony and a waste of time and money. So if you have made the colossal mistake of attempting “romance” (key point: I’m not romantic, either - at least not in a traditional way) then you MUST be hinting that it’s time for our relationship to end.

I actually have a commitment – not romantic, and not one-on-one – tomorrow night, so it’s a non-issue for me. But when I get home? Sweats and the movie “Some Like It Hot” which opens in Chicago and includes reference to the massacre in question.

And maybe pizza.

And a beer.

Ah, romance!

To all those who also are not celebrating this martyr: You're welcome for the logical excuse.

A Winter's Tale, or "Everyone Has a Story"

On Thursday of this week, there was a snowstorm. Big surprise, it's winter: This is the Midwest.

On Thursday of this week, there was a major pile-up on a major interstate, due to the storm.

On Thursday of this week, it took me over two hours to get home from work - a drive that usually takes 45-50 minutes. 

I know, everyone has their story of the big storm from "that" winter. And to be honest, the thing that makes one of these stories any good is if you were there. This is not a story like that. I've been in worse storms, if I want to tell a storm story!

But during my massive drive home, which included Interstate, State highway through a business district, State highway through the country, and backroads in the hills, there was just one incident that sort of reminded me that everyone is in the same boat.

It was in the hilly section. I'd been driving long, and probably about 5 minutes from home. I was ready to feel the relief!

The second to last street before home is hilly. I make a left turn, down two small hills, down a longer slope with an even longer rise at the end before it almost levels and I make the final left turn onto the street to home.

(with me so far? It's a straight road, but for the vertical curves including one steep descent with a steeper rise.)

I turn onto this road, and see a car with flashers pulled to the side just before the steep hill, and see the reflections on the trees indicating more such lights at the base of the steep hill.

Upon asking, the woman in the first car says she's fine, but isn't sure what's happening at the base of the hill and wants to be sure the TWO cars down there can go before she continues. Since I was out of my car already, I just started walking toward the hill to find out. A guy met me at the top of the slope, walking up from the (what I assumed was an) accident.

This guy recognized me as living in the area. (who knew!) He said that it wasn't an accident, and asked if I have 4WD. I do not. He said, "Well, without it I don't think anyone will make it up that hill" (on the steeper side).

Turns out, his girlfriend's car couldn't make it up the hill, so he brought his 4WD pick-up out to try to push her up the slope, but her wheels wouldn't grab and she ended up pushing them both back to the bottom of the hill. But everyone was fine, and they were working on it.

I don't know why I love this. The woman with her flashers, waiting patiently in the snow to see what's up with the icy hill. The guy who went out in the storm to try to push his girlfriend's car up the icy hill. The fact that the hill was so icy that my normal route was impassable, the camaraderie with people whose names I don't even know ...maybe it's just the fact that it had been such a long drive and I was so close to home ...

All these hilly roads connect up. I was able to back up and go around another way and get home 15 minutes later.

But I do think that next time I meet people in these types of situations, I will introduce myself. It would be nice to know the names of these neighbors I don't know!

What's your "winter storm story?"

True Love by Donuts

SHHHhh... Brett and Kirsten are still asleep.

That's right. I'm blogging from Brett's house. (This post will probably only be interesting to regular followers of the "Red and Brett" romance. If you're new here, check out last year's post that started it all for some insight into where I'm coming from. OR, just for something different, I recommend my "pervert" post.)

I'm up but Brett and his daughter are not. We're from two different time zones. My body is in the habit of getting up an hour earlier because of the time difference. Well okay, that and the fact that I get up super-early to be at work early, whereas Brett works nights. Yeah. We're not exactly on the same schedule.

When I awoke this morning to the point where I couldn't ignore it, and could see light coming in the kitchen window, it was 6:35. They're sound asleep. I decided to walk up to the gas station for coffee. See, there are some unavoidable differences between Brett and myself, besides the whole time/schedule thing:

Coffee - He doesn't drink it on a regular basis.

The Cold - I think he recently posted something about how much he hates cold weather, but maybe that was on Facebook or Twitter. Anyway, he HATES it. So I wouldn't consider asking him to venture out this morning.

Exercise - Actually, Brett and I always end up going for a walk when we're together. Usually after a meal, sometimes with the dog (if he's visiting me). But first thing in the morning? ...well okay, we've never tried.

ANYWAY, I'm awake, so decided to walk to the gas station. I figured "if Brett gets up, he'll see my blankets are still all messy on the sofa, and know I didn't just leave."
...I don't know why I had that thought, like as if this was some trashy booty-call or something. It's a totally bizarre thing to cross my mind! But I thought it. Call it lack of caffeine or whatever...

I got up, pulled on jeans from yesterday and a ball-cap, reached for my coat...

There's a problem. I'm a bed-maker. At home I don't get into the shower before my bed's made, and I certainly couldn't leave the house with the "blankets all messy..." so I folded them neatly and put them away before I left.

DUDE! It's friggin' COLD! It was a nice walk, but I couldn't feel my ears by the time I got there.

One giant coffee (to last me the morning), one Mt. Dew for Brett, and a half-dozen donuts later, I went back into the cold.
The donuts were kind of an after-thought.

We have a donut thing.

I'm not a huge donut-fan, but ...caution, this is kind of sappy!...

Brett and I, living so far apart, text frequently. And occasionally there will be a series of texts trying to humorously comparatively better describe our affection. One time, Brett randomly texted "I love you so much I'd share my donuts with you." To which, I'm sure I replied something sweetly endearing like "What kind of donuts?" Because my mental image requires details! You know what I mean: am I visualizing a Dunkin Donuts box of a dozen, in which case will you let me have the "creme-filled"? Or are we talking about Entenmann's cake-style donuts in which case I want the crumb-top, or do you have a dozen Krispy-Kreme glazed? There's a different visual!

...Brett's so awesome. I think this quirk (I say "quirk" because it sounds cuter and more fun than "neurosis") of mine to need details drives him crazy, but he laughs.

Well, the next time I visited we bought donuts. I think that was my idea, because I distinctly remember discussing the *fact* that "Of course your town has a bakery where they make fresh donuts" because if we were going to do this, I wanted to go all out and get fancy ones, and Brett informed me that he was sure there was no such bakery, that donuts came from the grocery store or the gas station, or a truck stop, but he did the research anyway just to verify that there wasn't a bakery he didn't know about, BECAUSE I kept pestering him to prove a point HE LOVES ME.

So today, donuts. Just 'cause.
From a gas station.

...and I think I might hear stirring in the back rooms of the house, so I better be done.
I am totally becoming "that girl" who always talks about her relationship. What about you? Tell me your funny relationship story! (I know you've got them...)

Gun Control - IS There an Answer?

Yoiks. I hate this subject.

It's all over my Facebook page, both sides. It's all over the news.

This is what America is reduced to this year: Arguing over "solving" an issue that perhaps is unsolvable.

Oops. How terribly un-PC of me to say that.

First off, I probably wouldn't even discuss it, but I've found a very open-minded, both-sides telling, non-judgmental columnist to read in the Indianapolis Star. Here is a link to Erika D. Smith's writings, so you can judge for yourself. (I don't know her, am not advertising for her, I just love her and follow her on twitter.)

She recently wrote about the gun argument. A non-gun-owner, and not a fan of guns in general, she tried them out, talked to people she knows, in order to better understand where the other side is coming from.

Imagine.

She didn't just lambaste everyone with an opposing view, call them all idiots, and discard their opinion. She looked into it.

But moving on...

It's easy to say "look at the gun laws of [XYZ country] - they seem to work" but should we just repeat what another country is doing? That's a bit like looking at the way other parents do their job and saying "it works for them - it'll work for us" when every child is different. We are a different country, with different issues and attitudes, good or bad.

No, let's not copy another country's laws.

Stop me if I've told you this, but when I was a kid, going to school in India, one year we were getting ready to come back to the States for a year on furlough. We were going to live in Chicago so my Dad could study at the University of Chicago. All my friends in India signed my yearbook that year with messages urging me "Don't get raped or mugged in Chicago!" "Don't forget to lock your door!" "Don't go out alone in those mean city streets!"

The Irony? The previous three years were full of terrorist attacks in my home country of Sri Lanka, and related demonstrations outside my school in India, and all our friends in the States continually wrote concerned letters asking how we were faring through all the violence, and urging us to be careful, that they knew we would be, that they were praying for us, to get in touch and let them know we were okay...

It's the same! The brand of violence may differ, but it's everywhere.

Anyway, I avoid the subject, as Brett can confirm. Nobody can keep their calm when they discuss gun control, and it really brings me down. I guess that's why I decided to write this. It's not funny, or even fun, but I can say my piece here. (sorry for the un-funny)

I have no answer. No one has an answer, but everyone likes to think there is one, that we can somehow control violent behavior when we can't.

...Or can we? What do you think? Really.

Happy New Year! (wait, did I already say that?)

Last year around New Years, I posted this meme, just on a whim, and looking for things to write. I thought it would be interesting to do it again, and see how things have changed.

 

~~~~~

1. What did you do in 2012 that you’d never done before?
Well... took my niece horse-back riding in a State Park; heard Beethoven's Fifth Symphony performed live; um... Lots of the same stuff in new locations.

2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
According to this, last year I resolved to organize my house - HA! I organized it all right into storage! This year I resolve to post more, starting with at least once a week. ...so far, so good.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Apparently 6 employees at my new job had babies in the past year. I didn't know them at the time, though.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
I recently heard about two deaths from among my Delaware acquaintances. One former employee, and one friend from the theatre. Both getting on in years, neither one terribly shocking.

5. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?
Last year I said, "A new job, please." BONUS! For this year? My own residence!

6. What countries did you visit?
No countries this year.

7. What date from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why:Brett and I have several dates to choose from. May 2 is when we met in person, March 21 is the fateful flowers, February 14 he "proposed". I pick any of those. (I was going to list the date I moved, but I can't remember if it was April 28 or 29.)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Fitting into that bridesmaid dress!   >>>

9. What was your biggest failure?
I really had hoped to get back to Delaware for the Polar Bear Plunge this February, but I just can't afford it yet. Pretty bummed about that.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Not significantly.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My hot new car! Not fancy, but it suits me. (Pontiac G5...yellow.)

(Not unlike this...)

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
No one. Everyone was an idiot in 2012.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Shooters. Sandyhook, most recently. But EVEN MORESO...the debates that followed. Everyone is so deadlocked on their own side that I am beginning to believe that this country has completely lost all ability to compromise. It's very sad.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Gas to go visit Brett!

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Most trips to see Brett, but I think Thanksgiving was most anticipated. And well worth it!

16. What song will always remind you of 2012?
None, really. Different songs had significance, but I don't think any will make me think - "Oh! That was 2012!"

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Happier, overall.
ii. thinner or fatter? about the same.
iii. richer or poorer? Poorer. After moving, it took 5 months to find the job I have, and another month+ before the hours picked up.


18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Exercise

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
sitting

20. How did you spend Christmas?
With BRETT! Dinner and church on Christmas Eve, and then a big meal/games at his brothers on the 25th.

21. What do you feel you missed out on in 2012?When Brett and I were in Indy in July, we saw that there was a display at one of the major museums that looked interesting. It was going to be there through September, so we decided not to visit yet, since we could always come back. We never got back.

22. Did you fall in love in 2012?
TOTALLY! (But not with the guy I was considering when I did this last year.)

23. How many one-night stands?
None.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Being in my parents' house, I didn't get to watch "my" programs much. Hm... Probably The Price Is Right, based on how much I posted about it on FB. (I wasn't working - what do you expect?)

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Not at all.

26. What was the best book you read?
The Help.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
No discoveries this year.

28. What did you want and get?
Brett! ...my dream man come to life. (AAAAWWwww...)

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
My impulse is to say "Moonrise Kingdom". Although I love "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel" too. My movie watching fell off near the end of 2012.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
My parents had cake. I don't like doing things for my birthday. Brett very sweetly had no gift for me, and even asked to verify that was what I prefer. Yes. It is.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Getting this job early enough that I could be in my own place by now.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?
unemployed.

34. What kept you sane?
My parents have been very supportive and deserve a lot of credit for not stifling me as they could have. ...and my nightly talks with Brett.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
They're all idiots.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Having just survived another election year, I am now totally turned off to all things political. This nation is so polarized now that I want to scream. Seriously, it makes me look at the virtues of a dictatorship: No Arguing!37. Who did you miss?
My friends in Delaware.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Ha! BRETT. (again. Yes, I know I'm a broken record.)

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012:
With the right people around you, any problem isn't a problem.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
“Blue canary in the outlet by the light-switch, who watches over you?” Doesn’t exactly “sum up” the year, but food for thought, no?
—————-
The rest of the meme says I should tag some people but isn't the point of a meme that anyone who likes it copies it? Yeah. That.

Wordpress Woes

Welcome to the new Doesn't Speak Klingon! I've been doing this for a year now, but really dropped off in the last few months due to lack of time and privacy (to protect my anonymity). As I stated on the 31st, my intention is to post at least once a week for now. It might not be exciting with pictures and stuff at first, since I also need to catch up on all of you, but, well, Here's to Good Intentions!

~~~~~

Dudes, ya’ll are bloggers. Ya’ll can tell by looking that I use Blogger (Blogspot) to manage this site. It was simple; it was there…I didn’t consider alternatives because I’d actually used blogger for an online journal in a class I took. Easy.

Well, part of my new job – yes! I’m working! – involves updating the company’s 10yo website. I am not a web-designer, I am a writer of business communications, with a reasonable understanding of online protocols. The web-designer they are using has chosen WordPress as the website home. Therefore, I am learning WordPress, too.

YUCK! My condolences to those of you who selected WordPress for your blogs and are now stuck.

ICK! The difficulties of formatting are so cumbersome!

WOW – I don’t know how those of you with photo-intensive blogs do it. Pictures are a pain in the rear.

Please don't be offended - I love reading your blogs! Maybe part of the problem is that I do not have total creative control. The web-designer is setting up the template and graphics, and I do the text and pictures. Still. I have extremely limited font type and size options. I cannot do columns. (Actually, I’ve never tried columns in Blogger, so maybe that’s an issue across the board.) Many visual tricks we want to do on just one page have to be done across the board or not at all.

At least, not being a blog, I won’t have to deal with comment-section issues that I know several WordPress users have struggled with.

I do love what I’m doing. I am the sole creative individual in an office of logicians. That’s over-simplifying, of course. What they do is creative in its way, but it’s creative within the parameters of mathematics. Likewise, I am an incredibly logical person, but my duties revolve around creating a desired image through words and pictures…a touchy-feely realm that is not a part of the jobs of those around me.

If the world needed tangible evidence of my “different-ness” from my coworkers they could just look in the parking lot. My little yellow coupe stands out among the dozen or so mid-size sedans and small SUVs that sit there parked in their shades of grey.

I am still technically on the payroll of my temp agency, so I am not filling my work-space with my personal, office fun-stuff as I had before. When I am hired on full-time, believe me, they will see!

New Years Resolutions

I'm pretty against New Years Resolutions, mostly because time is a man-made construct and blah-blah-blah...

But just for you, for my readers who still read this little blog even though I've barely posted at all this fall, I shall make a resolution for 2013.
Here goes:

IN 2013, I RESOLVE TO WRITE MORE IN MY BLOG. I WILL START WITH AT LEAST ONCE WEEKLY. PROBABLY ON THE WEEKENDS, WHICH I KNOW IS NOT A BIG TIME FOR BLOG-READING, SO PLEASE COME BY AND READ!

I LOVE YOU, MY BLOG COMMUNITY.

HAPPY NEW YEAR. MAY IT BE JOYOUS, SAFE, AND FULL OF LOVE.