16 April, 2018

Never Settle!

Are you playing the dating game? 
Do your friends tell you that you're too picky?
Maybe this "okay" guy/girl is "good enough"?

I was single for a very long time. I know something about this. Do NOT settle for less than you are worth. 

Ladies first: If you date a guy who bosses you around or tries to control what you are doing - watch out for that. Avoid it. Break it off with him at the first sign. It will not change.

Guys: Please do us all the favor of finding the right person, instead of taking the relationship to the next level "because it's that time." Breaks up are hard, but better than a lifetime of complaining! 

Guys and Girls: Does your date talk down to you? Do you always feel judged? Get out now. The pompous jerk/witch isn't worth your time and energy. YOU matter. You are valid. You deserve respect.

If you prefer playing the field and are not at a point of looking for any serious, long-term commitment, this may sound like it doesn't apply, but I still caution you to beware. If not, next thing you know, you have accidentally slid into a steady relationship with someone you don't really want to be with! So watch out.

If you are getting serious with someone, then any time you find yourself annoyed with him or her, consider if you can live with whatever it was that triggered the annoyance - FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE! For me, chewing with his mouth open is a deal breaker. I could never cope with that habit forever. It sounds petty, but when you see someone all the time, a repeated minor annoyance can become major. And don't plan on bad habits changing. I mean, they might, but don't bank your happiness on the hope that they will!

I've known many - MANY - women who tend to be attracted to men who "need fixing". I've seen it so very, very, very, very often. "He'd be perfect if he wouldn't..." "If only he would ... this would be a great relationship." Stop it! You cannot change anyone except yourself, and the sooner you recognize this, the happier you will be.

(If you're visiting from A to Z, please include the name of your blog as it is on the Master List so I can return the favor!)

4 comments:

  1. This applies after marriage too. I'm a great believer in marriage being a life-long commitment BUT not if he treats you badly, not if it's become toxic, not if you cry every day, not if you feel put down and belittled. It's better to be alone than to be tied to misery for a life sentence. And yes! Choose wisely because marriage is a big deal!

    Leanne | www.crestingthehill.com.au
    O for Open Your Eyes

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    1. Agreed. When I was dating my husband, my brother, who'd just gotten divorced, cautioned me to be careful. It was kind of sweet. My baby bro, offering me advice when I'd remained single for so long simply because I wouldn't settle!

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  2. Replies
    1. I balk at the word "waiting" but I wasn't going to settle ... so you must be pretty awesome!

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